Shazam, that is well written, thank you for your contribution! Beginning to feel that I'm a waste of life, this does not feel good at all. My shortcomings fill encyclopedias my accomplishments perhaps a single page or less.
I'm possibly discounting the fruits of my struggles, I hope so.
"It is not ours to wonder why
It is but ours to do or die"
Or
"All men live in darkness before mystery."
We know only our lives in nature,
our lives among men.
Heavens intentions for us remains beyond our grasp.
We may know our mission
Grasp our proper course of action and seek to please heaven by correct observance.
"But none can believe the good God means them."
Why would God want one of us let alone billions of us remains shrouded
our entire time on Earth.
We may know and recognize our proper mate, our best friend
Our parents and our children; we may even see God in their faces.
But we do not, can not know what God intends for us or how he sees our efforts.
But the wise lend us their wisdom in a a strange and wonderful consolation:
"None are good save God."
There is a ungetoverable division between creator and created.
We may be lacking in goodness, but the creator is goodness.
The steady hand that shaped us shaped us to a purpose that is his alone.
Yet lent to us by incarnation. We know only that he "intended" us to be.
We may know as well how we are to live among men. We may know how to best further
Nature that endlessly supports the life "He" created.
But did we properly as individuals or as a species serve the purpose to which we were born?
We cannot know. We can only strive, often in darkness to live in his light.
All else is "In Gods Hands."
Or so it seems to me as I resolve myself To cling as I may to his light within me. In hope that his light will lead me home.